It's such a fine line between clever and stupid.

I hope everyone had a l-o-v-e-l-y weekend.

My valentine brought me home a large box of my favorite See's chocolates
when he returned from San Francisco late Friday.

The empty box went out with the trash this morning.
I'll let you draw your own conclusions . . . and feel free to judge.  My jeans are.

I, for one, am glad February 14 is over
because it means we can begin sledding the slippery slope that is the backside of February,

right on into the slim glimmer of hope that is March.
(But I'm going to keep my parka zipped until April, if you don't mind.)

Here at Small Works we strive to steer well clear of politics
(lest we offend our more delicate readers)

but today being President's Day,

George Washington, Andrew Johnson 1985

I thought it would be wholly appropriate to talk about a subject that is either loosely
or inextricably bound to it, depending on your position,
and that is LYING.

As in, your friends DO . . . your jeans DON'T.  

Although have you noticed that since they started putting stretchy stuff in every pair of jeans they make, it's getting a little harder to feel bad about yourself because they're so stretched out by the end of the day?  (And having just returned from spending a week with my parents and siblings, I could also add that "your GENES don't." Just a sidenote.)

The reason I was thinking about lying in conjunction with President's Day is that, although George Washington COULD NOT TELL A LIE,

your first grade teacher did when she taught you that story.

Which leads you to question the veracity of other things, of course.

There were times in school when I flat out knew what my teacher was telling me was wrong.

New Guinea, for instance, is NOT pronounced "New Gwin-ay-uh".  Duh.

Nor is the Danube the "Dan-you-bee." No surprise there.

And when Lindsay's Spanish teacher in Florida taught her class the "y'all" conjugation of the verb, I obviously had to do a little un-teaching later that night.

But there's a difference between malicious lying and stupidity 
(one of them is forgivable).

I would like to have a stern conversation, therefore, with the person who came up with and then sold the idea that technology would make our lives easier.

Because while I am posting this from my brand-spanking-new computer (at last!) there were plenty of little glitches connected with its setup.

We had to buy a new router, for one, because we eventually figured out that the wireless card was not compatible with the old one.  Which was fine -- except that now the other computer doesn't get the internet.  Hmmm.

And setting up the new router required two phone calls to tech support because the installation CD contained a bug.  Hmmm.

And since we seem to thrive on frustration, we also bought Russ a new netbook this weekend, and then went to the phone store to get a dandy little device that will let him take the internet wherever he goes.

Except in our own house. And the place he was trying to work today. (No broadband, which is the point of the device.)  Hmmm.  Back to the phone store. . .

While we were at the phone store (the first time), we realized Hannah was due for an upgrade and got her a cute and cool touch-screen phone, with which she was delighted.  Except that it would neither make nor receive calls.  The tech support people said it could take "anywhere from 2 to 48 hours to become active."  Hmmm.  

What they did not tell her was that she could wait 4800 hours and it wouldn't matter, since the SIM card was never activated.  Oops.

Good thing we have our own personal geek squad ready for any emergency!  (translation:  children born after 1985)

Although I'm afraid we've abused their services as of late.  Sorry.

We'll try not to buy anything that requires your help for awhile.

I'm truly sincere.
I don't want any technology that I can't fix by jiggling the antenna and adjusting the wad of tin foil a little.

(Will that be considered a lie if I call my daughter to come install the new Photoshop on my computer when it arrives later this week? Or will she think I'm just stupid?) 


Judy said...

I'm e-mailing you a drawing Andrew did in high school (during a city council meeting he had to attend, by the way) on this very topic. All I can say is AMEN.

Amelia and Justin said...

I honestly don't think I've ever known someone (or an entire family) that has had this much trouble with technology...Bummer.

It is nice to have your own tech support within driving distance (and one who speaks English instead of Indian...)

susan m hinckley said...

Yes, at least my personal tech support is willing to call the tech support people in India for me, since I'm too dumb to understand tech-speak most of the time . . . although after 9 hours on the phone with HP, even I felt like I was beginning to know what they were talking about. It didn't help, but at least I understood a little of it!

luanne said...

Tech speak is always doubly impossible if it's not in your native dialect. Which is all too frequently the case, in my experience.

My kids never understand why I'm not rushing out for the newest, coolest phone technology. Until they realize that instead I can let them claim it, earlier than they should. My feeling is always... if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

The problem is, sometimes mine finally breaks too.

Hope you're finally on the road to techno-bliss for the foreseeable future!

Chelsea said...

i appreciate that little salute to chelsea the techno-saver of the hinckley home.

it's been giving me a reason to hang out at home, you know, so it's not bad at all!

this is my way of paying you back for all the help you give me, all the time. seriously, all the time.

Allie said...

I hate technology. And I can't live without it anymore. Sigh.

VO said...

It does sound like ya'll (hahahaha) have been through the wringer with technology lately.

Have you ever been superstitious about things, like "You have to talk to it and say nice things to it otherwise it won't work!"

Maybe you need to chat with your items as they come through the doorway to your house?

I'm just sayin'.

susan m hinckley said...

I'm going to try that next time, VO, because it's too late this time. I can't think of ANYTHING nice to say to them . . . so I'd best not say anything at all.

VO said...

Oh no, it's never too late to start talking to them. Go on now, just tell the things they're doing a good job and betcha they'll start grooving along with you. Probably reading our very words right now. LOL.


Amanda and Christopher said...

Oh the necessary evils! There are times when I am pretty sure all technology is out to get me. It sounds like you have had one of those.....uhm.....lifetimes? Just think if you didn't have technology, we all would not have the joy of experiencing your art and words!

susan m hinckley said...

Well now aren't you sweet, Amanda!

I was actually just thinking, "I LOVE MY NEW COMPUTER!" (except for a few little things, like how loud the keyboard is for one) so I guess technology does make our lives richer in many ways, but it doesn't make my life EASIER. Well, the dishwasher does, but not all these fancy electronics. I can understand the dishwasher -- I was raised with one.

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